Let me start off and tell you that I know what it’s like and how difficult it may be to stay connected to your spouse while having children. If you’re anything like me and have a house full of children, then you know the difficulties that come with trying to stay connected to your spouse.

Life gets chaotic and especially during these times of the pandemic, life is definitely not normal. We are living in unprecedented times and although many families are home together there are more constraints that exist.

I want to encourage you that it is possible for you to still stay connected to your spouse during these times of uncertainty. In fact, I believe that it is very imperative and excruciating for you to stay connected.

I heard someone once say to me that “children are only a temporary assignment but marriage is one that lasts a lifetime.” That statement spoke to me deeply. Let me tell you why.

Stay Connected

For many years I believed that my children were the one thing that kept my husband and I together. I held so much emphasis on the fact that my children needed both parents.

Whereas my husband thought the opposite. He always posed this question to me, “when our children get older what will happen to us?” I guess he was referring to the statement I mentioned above. Children are only temporary assignments.

Basically children will grow up and live healthy lives on their own. However, if you base your relationship and your marriage ultimately on your children’s sake once the children are gone what will you have? I had to really understand this and seek God’s ultimate plan and purpose for my marriage.

5 Ways to Stay Connected

I’ve learned that it is truly my responsibility as a wife to find ways to stay connected to my husband. This is regardless of whatever is going on in our lives. I cannot put so much emphasis on my children because my first ministry is my marriage to my husband.

1. Make Time For Him

During these chaotic times, I have been exhausted trying to keep my head above water in a sense. I have been trying to juggle life altogether. Keeping my business flowing while still trying to be creative. By the end of the night, I have been so exhausted and not able to give my husband the time that he deserves. God convicted me in my actions. Once I realized what I was doing and how he was getting the short end of the stick, I knew I needed to do something better.

2. Date Your Husband

Listen, I am so big on this. You really need to date your husband every day. If you want to keep him engaged and intrigued, then I believe it’s a necessity for you to date him. Yes, daily! Every day you should be keeping him excited to come home. It is my sole belief that men have a low attention span. Believe what you wanna believe. But it is my sole belief that men need to be engaged. Therefore, I have found myself being spontaneous and reinventing myself for my husband.

3. Serve Your Husband

Now listen, I know many of you are already thinking that I am crazy. I keep saying all these things that women need to do for their husbands. However, I will let you know that I was not always like this. It wasn’t always my belief that I needed to serve my husband. I did not believe that I needed to do all of these things in order to keep him engaged. Heck, I didn’t know I had to keep him engaged. It was my belief that once we were married then he must’ve been engaged. Hahaha!

However, I had to learn the hard way. I had to learn how to truly serve my husband. I believe that once I was serving my husband, then I was serving God. It is my job as a not only as a wife but a child of God to faithful to my ministry. Being faithful to my calling is an example of my obedience to my calling and purpose.

4. Flirt Daily

Before my husband and I got married we were very flirtatious with one another. This is something that has continued in our marriage. Literally, people tell us all the time that the energy we give off is so attractive.

Honestly, it’s something that comes so naturally to us though. I am naturally attracted to my husband and vice versa. Therefore, flirting is something that is so natural to us. However, there are many people that we know personally that have stop flirting. Therefore, I encourage you now in order to stay connected and keep the spark, start flirting again!

5. Be Affectionate

Being affectionate in your marriage is truly a love tone. Yes, it is captivated by a love language. Being affectionate has everything to do with physical touch and being in close proximity to your spouse. There are many people in relationships that are not aware of their love language. This is where the conflict begins. Perhaps you can understand where the miscommunication derives from.

One person in a relationship may be more affectionate than the other. This could truly be an issue. Therefore, I encourage you to be touchy-feely. Be affectionate and hold hands while watching a movie. I encourage you to be spontaneous and walk up to each other unexpectedly and just show an expression of your love for one another. There is so much power in a hug. Find ways to be affectionate towards your husband.

Stay Connected By Being Intentional

Many people question and ask how on earth do we stay connected with a house full of children, literally! Although there are times that it seems nearly impossible to stay connected, I found that there is always a way.

It’s all about being intentional in your actions. It’s all about creating the atmosphere and being obedient to your ministry. Understand that your marriage is your ministry. The way that you perform in your ministry is an act of your service to God.

Please let me know if I missed anything. If this post at all has touched you in any way please leave me a comment and tell me. I love to read all of the comments and will respond.

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